Well, you know how I feel about the word Cougar — don’t like it. Wrote about it many times on FWW.

But the word and the lifestage it defines are so pervasive now that Saturday Night Live is doing ongoing Cougar skits. They did one again this past Saturday with Cameron Diaz.

We cannot deny that older women are now back on the market in large numbers as a direct result of divorce, and that younger men are a viable romantic option like never before.

I think it’s a good thing that women are busting up the old double standard — and yes, I admit it provides lots of comedy — BUT, Saturday Night Live inspired me to address the stereotype directly to the show. So here goes.

My Dear SNL writers,

The Cougar Den & Cameron Diaz are hysterical.

You have inspired me to do kegels as I write this.

In fact, I am even thinking of turning my spare room into a cougar den thanks to you all.

I just wanted to point out that while you're dreaming up new cougar episodes, you might want to consider that cougars (even though I hate that word) come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. They don't all look like Cameron Diaz.

You might want to broaden your cougar casting options.

The bimbo thing is something you might want to look into, too.

Cougars, because they are older — as you so clearly “coif” them — lean more toward being professional and experienced. Most are not floozies (even though some neighbors might disagree). We're talkin’ educated, been-there-done-that women exploring new options.

What the hell, the dating pool is much shallower later in life and filled with many older men who are leaking testosterone in search of arm candy to validate their masculinity.

Obviously my "coolness" factor is on the upswing, as I was invited to the gala premiere movie screening of The Lifetime original movie Coco Chanel — hosted by Lifetime Television, Vidal Sassoon and The Hollywood Reporter Monday night.

I loved it! And highly recommend you tune in if you find your "cute divorced self" sitting on the couch this coming Saturday night.

Shirley MacLaine, who plays Coco in the later years of her life, was in person at the event, and was just fabulous. Barbara Bobulova, who played Coco as a younger woman was incredible.

Why is this all relevant to you?

Well, Coco Chanel's story is an incredible inspiration to any woman who has had to "make it on her own." She never married, and had regrets about that. She loved deeply, but suffered many instances of great loss. Her work became her drug of choice to cope.

Many of us know that drill.

According to Shirley MacLaine, Coco was a name borrowed from a dog in a bar. Coco's real name was Gabrielle, and her real last name was Chaznel. Coco's character had a couple of lines in the movie that really resonated; I typed the words I wanted to remember to tell you on the keypad of my silent iPhone, in the dark, during the movie without reading glasses.

When I checked back today to clarify the quote, it read "channel cinnabons."

OK — it's the dreaded last week of summer...and we all hang on to it like a dog to the pant leg of a postman. This might be a good thing since everyone I know has gained weight since it began.

What's up with that?

Bloated single moms everywhere are racing around getting their kids ready for school. Booting up for back to school is "tums"-ultuous when you're a single mom. It's a frenzy of exhausting checklists, kids need everything, and you are a human money pit.

Going away, if you can swing it or a few more rule-free days, is a good thing...staying home and puttering around is also a good thing.

There's nobody to do business with...or make an impression upon.

Nobody cares...well almost nobody.

If people owe you money, you cant get a hold of them.

If you owe people money, they're away and you buy a few days.

The mythical end of summer will confuse you next week because you pull back the curtain and it will still look and feel exactly like summer, only you are not supposed to be having fun anymore.

So — whatever is going on with you this week, make sure you try to maximize any and every last window of opportunity of guilt-free summer pleasure for yourself.

You know you deserve it, and goodness knows next week is going to feel a lot different...even if it looks the same.

Imagine? YOU could take The Gold every time!

Inspired by the Olympics and delusional that I somehow can still get my body to look like those women's volleyball contenders, I was thinking...

There are so many things a divorced gal becomes proficient at by necessity — by herself — that there should be some way to get credit for it. Just maybe there should be some kind of Divorced Women's Olympics.

There would be global contenders.

Here are some divisions in which any one of you could take a medal:

Grocery Power Lifting

The Financial Balance Beam

She-Man Provider Competition

Single Mom Relay

Solo Wrestling With Yourself

Set the Table Tennis

Laundry Volleyball

Extreme Soul Searching

My favorite? The Divorce Decathalon!

"Heptathlon" actually is the proper word for the female version of this track and field competition, made up of these seven events: 100 meter hurdles, high jump, shot put, 200 meter sprint, long jump, javelin throw, and the 800 meter run.

As we all know, this sounds like a typical day BEFORE lunch.

The final event would be the "Late Life Luge"...jump on, hang on, close your eyes, say a prayer, take the ride of your life and hope you make it to the finish line in one piece.

The last one might take some extra practice but since you've got nothing to lose — you might as well Go For The Gold!

OK, it's a weekend...and my "Guilt-O-Meter" will begin to rise from LIGHTLY GUILTY on Friday night to HOLY MOTHER OF GUILT by Sunday night.

Here how's it works:

Friday:

It all starts mid-Friday for this single mom, with thoughts of weekend "possibilities". It's a running battle of Guilt vs. Pleasure, and it's played out like a really sadistic game show.

Beginning about midday, thoughts of the approaching night swirl through my head... Friends? Romance? Exercise? Romance? Family? Romance?

If I wait too long to make a decision it gets dark out, and I get pooped out.

But Friday night is supposed to be the start of a breather and, with a little extra caffeine, I can gear up for pleasure. Unless it happens to storm, my hair’s too dirty, or I'm too fat...all of which even I can mostly get past these days with my new free wheeling thinking.

If I miss the caffeine, I land on the couch.

If I make it out, I am usually already guilty when I wake up on Saturday.

Saturday:

The GUILT-O-METER starts at "PARTLY GUILTY" the minute I open my eyes and steadily rises. As I zoom around doing errands , thoughts of Needs vs Desires thrash around in my head.

The Needs: things like a car wash, household fixits, food shopping, laundry, manicure, etc., etc., etc. are all pitted directly against…

The Desires: laying at a pool, going on a boat, buddy time with my daughter, and lust. No time for sitting down here. Whichever I choose, I start feeling guilty about not doing the other.

Saturday Night:

The GUILT-O-METER holds steady at "MOSTLY GUILTY" because there's no way I completed everything on the Needs list earlier, and I am either out thinking screw it or I am home on the couch passed out.

My girlfriend just emailed me and asked if I had "blog block." Yup guess that's it. A name for my condition. I didn't realize it was an official condition till just now.

You may have noticed the date of my last post. So what — you ask — have I been doing?

Well...everything you could possibly imagine and some stuff you wouldn't even believe.

Lately I have only two speeds — GO and PASS OUT — and I maximize every hour of the day I am blessed with.

Funny, I write all day long in my head but apparently my head and my hands have not been communicating. I assume that would translate into Blocked- Head as opposed to Blockhead which is so unfeminine....

So I am in search of the antidote to Blog Block and I aspire to my next post — shortly.

Debbie

Marriage is wonderful when it works. Everyone is looking for a happily ever after.

But marriage takes energy, and these days average couples are working harder than ever to keep a marriage together, so you can imagine the challenge for a couple in the limelight, like Star Jones and Al Reynolds.

Someone told me they overheard Star on a plane a couple months ago saying that she and her husband had not even been in the same city over the last few months.

Can't blame the airlines for this long a layover.

For reasons only Star and Al know, one or more things along the way changed up their original gameplan for their version of..."happily ever after." I don't think she had that big wedding with the intention of getting divorced...getting a few freebies, maybe.

No one has a wedding with the intention of getting divorced. No one should judge, though people due to human nature cannot help themselves. Like Star said, "The dissolution of a marriage is a difficult time in anyone's life that requires privacy with one's thoughts."

Regardless of who files for divorce, it's painful and awkward for everyone involved.

There will be some other version of "happily ever after" for her and for him.

Though it's hard to imagine at the time, usually events that force change often bring you to a stronger better place — sometimes just a stronger arm — but hey, that also works.

Everyone who goes through divorce has another version of "happily ever after" within their reach.

Last night I went to one of the now recurring High School girlfriend gatherings at PF Chang's up in Stamford, Ct.

Remember what they said about Catholic HS girls? Well they were right — only we are much worse now. Only kidding — not really — half-kidding...geez we love to laugh.

Anyway, there's a pretty diverse group: Some married forever, with kids without kids, some divorced, and some have just stayed solo. Oh yeah, and one honorary husband who can't get enough of us. The group grows every time we convince someone through a chain of frenzied emails to locate someone from our past and convince them they are missing out on all the fun.

For years, when I was struggling as a single mom gone awry, I wouldn't show up. Then one day I was glad I did, and the unconditional girlfriend friendship convinced me to do it again and again.

Last night, one of the "lifelong solo" girls, having recently launched Mr. Wrong, announced she bought herself a boat. I suggested we give her a "boat shower". Solo gals get ripped off. They never get the payback benefit of all those bridal and baby showers they've paid into.

So it's done. The "boat shower" is in the works. We're just waiting for her to register at some marine shop so we don't all show up with the same little dinghys.

Hi guys,

I am on the way to Rhode Island. The love for First Wives World and all that we represent continues. We got a call last week from a company which produces features that air on hundreds of TV stations wanting to do a story. So, today is the day and I am on my way.

It's a one day trip and I have five jackets, six hair contraptions, four pairs of shoes, an arsenal of make up, my computer, phone and a plethora of plugs and chargers. This is one of those days it might have been nice to have had a "better half" who might have convinced me I didn't need half this stuff.

But then again, the "better half" might have wanted to come along and drive, and if there's one thing I don't miss it's begging someone to make a pit stop or two... or three... or four...

Love,

Debbie Nigro, First Wives World's Chief Executive Girlfriend

Think Valentine's Day is going to be a big drag? Think again. There are a few advantages...!

#1 You won't have to hide behind a planter at the hotel check in.

#2 You don't have to shave anything.

#3 It won't matter whether or not your cell phone has reception.

#4 All the chocolate is yours.

#5 You don't have to kill yourself looking for a bud vase.

#6 Nobody has time for a manicure/pedicure during the middle of the week anyway.

#7 You can buy your own flowers in the morning and get it over with.

#8 You can spare yourself a brain tumor trying to find a babysitter.

#9 You can call up all your old boyfriends "legally".

#10 No one is going to ask you to model a G-String.

Love,

Debbie Nigro, First Wives World's Chief Executive Girlfriend