firstwivesworld - Living in the Real World - Comments

The No Children Syndrome

Wanda Woodard — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 13:48:28 -0400

Yep. Cathy, we often talk about this, and you are absolutely right. But, remember, a child in their life would have changed them, too. How....Well, perhaps they would be looser. ...nah!

Even then...

Wanda Woodard — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 11:05:43 -0400

Some people do not really grasp it. I think they get their priorities all messed up. If my children know, beyond a shadow of a doubt , that they are loved unconditionally -- that is good enough. Housework be damned!

Aint it the truth

Wanda Woodard — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 11:04:32 -0400

Right on, Elaina. Right on!

Your brother's child...

Cathy Meyer — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 00:01:31 -0400

I've often wondered what a child born to your brother and my sister would be like. I'm thinking no one could stand to be around it because they would spoil it. That would be one rotten child! People who don't have children can't understand the heart break that can come with punishing them. If they knew that kind of love vacuuming the rug would be low on their list of priorities.

here here!

Guest — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 20:21:15 -0400

I with you on that one. Unless you have kids, you don't know squat about raising them.

I say, people with no

Elaina Goodman — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 11:09:30 -0400

I say, people with no children don't get a vote in this matter. Actually, when it comes to raising YOUR children, no one gets to vote but you!

We all should, from time to

Guest — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 20:27:35 -0400

We all should, from time to time, put ourselves in other people's shoes. Maybe then we wouldn't be so quick to judge. CM

Living in the Real World

Wanda Woodard — Fri, 18 Apr 2008 17:00:10 -0400

My brother thinks I'm too lenient with my children. I love him, but he and his wife never had kids. They've been married 28 years. Each has had the same job for nearly 20 years. They live in a home where you can see where the vacuum cleaner made its last stroke.

This is not the real world.

I live in a world filled with a dining table that serves as a place to put everything — bills, toys, drawings, reading glasses, books, clothes. My floor by the front door has a litter of shoes on both sides: tennis shoes, a pair of high heels, sandals, and flip-flops in sizes 7, 8, and 9.

My wooden floors are scuffed.

There is always some sort of sheet covering two of the three cushions of the only new purchase I have made since moving here after Hurricane Katrina — my lovely, comfy couch. The sheet protects my sofa from my dog Brittney's claws and hair and doggy smell, or so I think.

(Oh, and as a matter of reference, the dog came with her name — I rescued her from an abusive 26-year-old male neighbor — and that was the name she'd had for a year and a half.)

We run out of milk. There is often no bread, and we've actually had Edy's Rich & Creamy mint chocolate chip ice cream for dinner. Yep. That's the truth.

And when my son got in trouble for threatening to hurt another boy that he's been in and out of fights with since the beginning of school and got two days of suspension, I punished him with five licks, (not in anger), and no supper.

I felt bad for him because I know that the boy in question is a pain in the ass and has been for my son all year. But, my 11-year-old son has to learn to live within the confines of society, and there is a zero tolerance in schools for hitting or threatening to hit.