Some day, in addition to taking your child’s temperature if you think she’s sick, there might come a time to take a child’s cortisol level to see if the arguing between you and your husband (or your ex) is stressing her out.

Researchers know that children who get upset when their parents fight are more likely to have later psychological problems. Science Daily reports that cortisol, a stress hormone, may be a culprit, and also a good marker.

Three universities — Rochester, Minnesota, Notre Dame — collaborated on the study, which looked at 208 mostly white 6 year olds and their mothers. The “arguments” were not face to face, but simulated arguments on the telephone. During and after the call, the researchers measured the child’s distress, hostility, and level of involvement in the argument. They also asked the mothers to record what kind of behavior they saw at home when there was an argument between the parents.

Don’t worry: no needles were involved. Cortisol can be measured with a simple saliva test. And the children who seemed most distressed by the mock argument showed higher levels of cortisol.

"Because higher levels of cortisol have been linked to a wide range of mental and physical health difficulties, high levels of cortisol may help explain why children who experience high levels of distress when their parents argue are more likely to experience later health problems," said Patrick T. Davies, a professor of psychology at the University of Rochester, who led the study.

The poll our site ran last week shows that the vast majority of our members feel that if the parents are truly unhappy, it never makes sense to stay together “for the sake of the children.” Children clearly suffer when there is tension in the home.

After going through the stress of many in vitro fertilizations, I vivdly remember signing a paper giving the unused embryos to scientific research. In my mind, it was the least I could do since, thanks to this modern day miracle, I could possible conceive the child I so desperately wanted.

But I also realized that the pain — both physical and emotional — of this process could also break couples apart. It was right there in front of me, as I witnessed the cumulative strain on people in the waiting room.

What, I wondered, would happen to their embryos if indeed they broke up? A woman on fertility drugs can produce as many as 20 or 30 eggs. Who would get them?

The nurses would smile and tell me not to worry about it, especially since my husband and I were, they said, such a happy couple. Naturally the reporter in me wanted answers. Where exactly did the embryos go? Did they go into one large unpatrolled laboratory where a rogue nurse would sell them elsewhere. And then, in years to come, I'd meet my lookalike in the mall.

Yes, I know, it seems like something out of a Robin Cook medical thriller, and I laughed at how fertile my imagination could be. So did the nurses. Everything, they assured me, was properly monitored and nothing could happen to the embryos without both parents’ consent.

With in vitro fertilization (IVF), doctors usually implant no more than four fertilized eggs to prevent high-multiple births. In Oregon, a divorced couple split on what to do with their six frozen fertilized eggs, and the case ended up in the Oregon Court of Appeals.

Laura Dahl and her former husband, Darrell Angle, had stored their “embryos” with Oregon Health and Science University, where she had undergone IVF. (For the sake of argument, the court called the fertilized eggs “embryos,” although they said that, technically, they would become embryos only once implanted in a woman’s womb.)

Ever notice the girls who mature quicker?

It's easy to chalk it up to an evolving society. Everything happens quicker, faster, earlier for the generations that follow. Exposure to the media, the Internet, and an immediacy for information puts our children (or in some cases, our children's children) in fast forward.

New research, however, shows that environmental factors of early puberty might hit closer to home than you think.

International studies have cited divorce as the culprit behind a range of medical conditions, from asthma and eczema to diabetes — in addition to deteriorating the environment.

Now you can add early puberty to the list. The University of Arizona, in conjunction with New Zealand's University of Canterbury, studied the effects of absentee fathers and divorce on adolescent development, and found that young females without a positive paternal influence developed earlier — sometimes as much as one year's difference.

Early puberty has been linked to teen pregnancy and various health issues, including breast cancer.

Researchers haven't determined why this is so, but have suggested an evolutionary biology link. Says the University of Arizona article:

"The idea is that children adjust their development to match the environments in which they live," Ellis said. "In the world in which humans evolved, dangerous or unstable home environments meant a shorter lifespan, and going into puberty earlier in this context increased chances of surviving, reproducing and passing on your genes."

I ran across an interesting article the other day. A young couple married, lived together, had a child in their seven-year relationship and got divorced. I know. There's nothing earth shattering about that. Keep reading.

It was a same-sex couple, except one of the two didn't know it.

Jennifer Jack married Andrew Mireles at 16. They parted ways after one child and seven years. Jack decided to flip through a high school yearbook one day, and she found a picture of her ex-husband, Andrew - or should I say, Phyllis?

Phyllis Mireles changed "gender" at some time in her life, taking on the name Andrew. No sex change, no funky surgery, and all the equipment was perfectly female, reports Fox News. Mireles claims Jack knew of Mireles' true gender all along — and I'm having trouble swallowing that Jack states otherwise.

It seems a judge is swallowing Jack's shocked disbelief - he's allowing an annulment.

I must be missing something. I mean, seven years, people. And a child. It's pretty tough to hide that you don't have a penis for that long. The courts buy this?

Mireles now finds himself in a custody battle for his (her?) kids. Jack's attorney states that Mireles is "a convicted felon and has some indiscretions that would put him back in jail if his probation was revoked."

I'm wondering where this came from? Were these issues before Mireles was outed from the proverbial closet? Was Mireles a bad person with his kids? Is this just some scheme to get back at him for being cross gender?

And what about Jack? Why the horrified reaction now? Is Jack embarrassed that she lived with a woman and now wants to protect her self-identity through revenge?

Remember — seven years, one child. And Jack didn't know her husband was a she? Yeah. Right.

Here's one of those medical study stories that you're not sure whether to believe. But if there's any credence to it, this one is pretty scary.

Researchers in Sweden say that babies of separated parents are three times more likely to develop diabetes. The theory is that children — even babies — pick up on the stress their parents are feeling and it causes them to becomes stressed, themselves. And that, in turn, leads to auto-immunity, a condition where the immune system attacks insulin-producing cells.

I only saw a brief mention of this and didn't see much else in the way of support for the theory. But if there's anything to this study, it's something worth looking into. Here in the U.S., we have increasing rates of childhood obesity and diabetes, and I don't remember hearing anyone link up these problems with our sky-high divorce rate. Is there a correlation? Maybe there are some more researchers out there willing to check it out.

Click here for more.

Here's the gist of it: Augusta Roman tried for several years to have a child before resorting to fertility treatments. The day before the embryos were to be implanted, her husband, Randy, told her he wanted to wait until they had resolved their problems. After six months of counseling, they divorced.

The dispute escalated as the fertility lab consent form clearly stated that in the event of divorce, the embryos would not be implanted and would be discarded. Augusta sued and was granted control of the embryos in the Trial Court but her husband appealed the case; the Appeals Court unanimously reversed the lower court. Augusta then appealed to the Texas Supreme Court which recently refused to hear the appeal, thus upholding the Appellate Court's decision.

The case raises a moral and legal dilemma for August, 45, who regards the embryos as her unborn children. She said she would sign away any support responsibility for the divorced husband. Her attorney attempted to distinguish this consent form from an enforceable contract.

While I commiserate with Augusta's sincere desire to become a mother, it would be bad public policy to ignore the clear meaning of the consent form. In fact, the form had an option, if chosen by both parties, for releasing the embryos to either spouse. But neither made that choice and instead, checked the option to discard the embryos.

Andy didn't want a child after the divorce and even though Texas law protects anonymous sperm donors from child support, this is a different case. There is legal precedent for sperm donors to be liable for support. Family courts could award financial support despite the waiver by the wife.

More Lohan family news today: Actress Lindsay Lohan's father withdrew a request to have his estranged wife tested for drugs. Michael and Dina Lohan appeared in court yesterday to discuss custody and child support arrangements for their two minor kids Ali and Dakota. Michael has admitted to alcohol abuse; he alleges that Dina takes pills. Lindsay was arrested more than a week ago for cocaine possession and driving while under the influence--she was sprung from rehab three weeks ago.

Michael said that withdrawing the request might improve his chances of being granted visitation rights with his children. He was released from prison in March and currently only has telephone calls with his daughter Ali,13, and her brother, Dakota, 10. Lindsay, 21, and her brother Michael Lohan Jr., 19, aren't involved in the custody and visitation deal since they are no longer minors.

Family Court Judge Stacy D. Bennett is now waiting for the results of a review by a family therapist, which is due Sept. 6. The Lohans are due back in divorce court Aug. 10.

Click here for more.

First Wives World has a terrific column featured on About.com's Guide to Divorce Support. The Guide's coordinator, Cathy Meyer, graciously asked our own Debbie Nigro to write a guest column for a series she's running this week on "Moving On."

Well, guess what? No one has more experience with movin' on and movin' up than Debbie, who has successfully reinvented her personal and professional life, post-divorce, with incredible energy and verve. She's resilient, and so are you!

In fact, that's the message of her piece on About called "A Formula For Getting Back to Great." It's all about women being in control of their destiny and plodding ahead, putting one foot in front of the other to embrace the present and, of course, the future.

Cathy and her team of experts are providing valuable information and resources that can help get you through. In fact, About has everything from chat rooms where you can swap ideas and information, to advice columns on dating, legal and financial issues and tips on how to deal with your kids in a divorce. They've got everything!

So check it out...but stay tuned to FirstWivesWorld.com because we're on the cusp of some exciting plans that will help you navigate divorce no matter what stage you're in--in fact, we're going to get you through each phase not only with useful resources and support from other women, but you'll be there with a smile on your face because we've got some fun, new shows that will entertain and tickle you as you discover that your best self lies ahead...

Yes, stay tuned. We can't wait...! And, check out Debbie's column here.

It’s not surprising when children of divorced parents end up having behavioral problems. But a new study that was published in the Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry says there may be one underlying reason for both the parents’ divorce and the children’s behavior issues: heredity.

Without getting into the methodology of the study, the basic finding was that parents who are genetically prone to being unhappy in their marriages are more likely to have children who experience depression and anxiety. So maybe it’s not the divorce that’s so tough on the kids—it’s the genes.

Of course, there’s a bit of a “chicken and the egg” here. Did the kids’ depression surface before or after the divorce happened? In some cases, the kids’ issues started before the parents actually split up, but there was already tension in the marriage.

Research aside, the important message here is that parents need to pay really close attention to their kids when marital problems start. The kids will naturally pick up on the rising tension in the home.

Somehow, you have to find a way to manage your own emotions and help your kids’ manage theirs too. That’s a challenge with no easy solutions. But being aware of everyone’s feelings is half the battle.

Click here for more.

The bitter divorce saga between former New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevey and Dina Matos McGreevey continues. McGreevey, in 2004, publicly disclosed that he’s gay, resigned and came clean about having an affair with a male aide.

Dina McGreevey, who last month published a tell-all book, Silent Partner: A Memoir of My Marriage, blames Jim for lackluster book sales because he called her “homophobic.” Unlike what she says in her book, Dina has also taken issue with the fact that he now claims she knew he was gay while they were married.

Meanwhile Jim says her book isn’t selling because it’s “poorly written” and “dull,” and, get this, because she dressed inappropriately for an interview on “Oprah” to plug the book. In a letter to a family court judge, McGreevey cited Dina’s “awful appearance” in “an inappropriate and ill-fitting ballgown with a plunging neckline.”

Thought your divorce was bad? Boy, do these two ever hate each other. My first impression of Jim’s comments, like most everyone’s I’m sure, was just a big “Huh? How stupid is that?” But think about how deep these marital wounds must be on both their parts.

I bet those fashion comments have less to do with Jim being an idiot and more to do with a well-thought out way of publicly humiliating Dina. He wasn’t trying to trash her for her appearance. He’s trying to prove she wasn’t the “in-the-dark” wife she says she was and, that she knew he was gay by making the most stereotypically gay comment possible.

If that’s not a man giving his ex the ultimate “up yours,” I don’t what is.

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